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Love, love me DON’T
Posted
February 27, 2007
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**Fabien flops down
on sofa**
Fenchurch:
What’s up with you?
Fabien: Just gotta catch my breath here -- **pause** It’s that damn Yevgeny.
Winslow: What,
he’s not staying dead enough for you?
Fabien:
**rolls eyes** I don’t kill ‘em, smart boy. Just work ‘em over.
Fenchurch: A
hitch in your plans, then?
Fabien: Wellll... it was going so well there. Mind you, I wasn’t in
a hurry with this one. Taking my time, using all my best
tricks. I’ve run him up one side and down the other and back again. And
back again, and back again. But he ain’t broke yet! I
don’t get it.
Fenchurch: You
remember, I didn’t ask you to bring him here. So my sympathy is limited.
Fabien: Heh, who says I’m asking for sympathy? I’m just stating a
fact here. The b*stard won’t give it up! I can’t
figure it out.
Fenchurch: Well,
you see why I broke it up with him. He was impossible and insufferable after a
while. Give you a kiss, and then the verbal equivalent of a kick. A mule was
easier to live with.
Fabien: It’s
not THAT –
Yevgeny: **enters, arms open wide** There you are, my devil mistress! These
childhood games are so much fun, but I weary of hide-and-seek. You know my arms
long to hold you close, my lips to kiss that mouth so full of wicked epithets –
Fenchurch and Winslow: **collective gasp, then:** HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!!!!
Yevgeny: **waves hand** Ignore those foolish brats!
Fabien, come with me, now. You promised not to leave my side –
Fabien: Hey, I
didn’t promise you anything! You
don’t listen to a word I say, or at least you sure don’t catch the drift of ‘em. You’re in your own little world, and I am so NOT part
of that! Now if you don’t mind, I’ve got some thongs to wash. Beat it, you
overheating samovar.
Yevgeny: **embraces her** That’s
what I adore about you – your complete and brutal frankness. Fenchurch was all
sweetness and caring, butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth. But
you – never a kind word. You relentlessly use and abuse me, step on my
foot, step on my heart. I’ve longed for someone like you all my life, and
didn’t know it until you entered Stage Right –
Winslow: Are
you sure it wasn’t Stage Left? *snerk*
Fenchurch: Or
rose from the
Fabien: ENOUGH
with the theatrical illusions –
Winslow: Don’t
you mean “allusions”?
Fenchurch: Think
about it, Win – she may have been right the first time! **the two of them
dissolve in laughter again**
Fabien:
**knocking Yevgeny onto the couch** I’m OUTTA HERE!
**exits**
Fenchurch:
Whoa – if I’d known you like abuse, I sure could’ve given you a smack upside
the head.
Yevgeny: There you go, teasing again.
Fenchurch: No
you don’t – I’m not about to give you anything. **pause**
Fenchurch: Oh,
what the heck! **FWACK!**
Yevgeny: Ow!
Winslow: And
to even up the other side -- **FWACK!**
Yevgeny: Ouch!
**they exit**
Yevgeny: Am I not a tragic figure – my love abandons
me, and I am kicked to the curb by the cold world.
Buddha Girl: **strolling
by** Eh, you just another DUMBASS.
Buddha Girl sure cuts to the
chase!
Next month starts with Beckham
finding himself in rising hot water. He
can’t win, even with his best bud Neville, in:
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