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Let Them Eat Cake – a Tabitha/Sparrows Story

 Posted May 25, 2006

 

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WARNING: Some scenes may be deemed questionable for viewing by the very young, easily offended, or just plain queasy.

 

Tabitha: **humming “Make a Little Birdhouse In Your Soul” while screwing cap back on bottle**

 

 

Chance: Um, Tabby, WHAT are you up to?

Tabitha: Soaking this little cake in booze.

Chance: I should know better than to ask, but WHY?

 

 

Tabitha: I got this great idea from a Blind Samurai movie. He told some kids that the best way to catch sparrows was with sake-soaked beans. So I’m going to catch those *expletive* flyin’ mice sisters with this booze-soaked cake.

Chance: Uh-huh. Why do I see “recipe for disaster” written all over this?

 

 

Tabitha: After what they did to me with my own hair ribbons, leaving me to Waramon, they DESERVE it!

Chance: Whatever. I’d like to say that I WON’T rescue you from your own idiocy – but – I’ll go look for a HazMat suit.

 

 

Tabitha: *to herself* Hehhehheh those little bird-poops will get what’s coming to them.

 

 

Tabitha: They should be coming by any time now…

 

 

Tabitha: Here they come…

Sparrow Sisters: Chirp-cheep-chirp-chirp-cheep-cheep-cheep **what it sounds like to Tabitha **

 

 

Buddha Girl: Eh, look, sisters – FLOOR CAKE!

 

 

Buddha Girl: We in luck today!

Angry Sparrow: It look good.

Tragic Plum: Ooooh, who would be leaving such a nice cake on the floor?...

 

 

Buddha Girl: Dis sure good cake – uumnnnn.

Angry Sparrow: I like cake.

Tragic Plum: Oooooh – should we be eating this BEFORE dinner?...

 

 

Tabitha: Hehhehheh – eat up, my little cockroaches!

 

 

Buddha Girl: *HIC* eh, dat some cake *HIC*

Angry Sparrow: *HIC* my head spin *HIC*

Tragic Plum: *HIC* Oooooooo *HIC*

 

 

Tabitha: A-HA – NOW I’ve clipped your wings, little mice – your tiny butts are MINE!

Sparrow Sisters: *HIC!!!*

 

 

Buddha Girl: *HIC* It dat big STUPID girl *HIC* we gotta fix HER, sisters! *HIC*

Angry Sparrow: *HIC* She no get away wit dis! *HIC*

Tragic Plum: *HIC* No, noooo, she CAN’T! *HIC*

 

 

Chance: O-kaaaay – I really shouldn’t be surprised by this –

Tabitha: *expletive* Who knew they were MEAN drunks!

Tarquin: Hehheh, Chance, your sis makes a great PINATA.

 

 

Buddha Girl: *retch* Dis not over YET – we still got score to settle – *RRRRAAAAALLLLPH*

Angry Sparrow: Yeh, we settle her score *urp*

Tragic Plum: Yes *gag* Ooooh, watch out for that toilet seat…

 

 

It’s not surprising that “Tabitha” and “trouble” both start with the same letter.

 

Tancredi caught the eye of Clara in OR, so much so that she bought a tan Lishe in hopes he would be her sweetie. Happily for Fenchurch, she did just that. Here is Tancredi’s response to the lovely E’Clair:

 

To mam’zelle E’Clair

 

 

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